Hair

I don't like long hair on men.  Over the years, I've known a few long-haired males with gorgeous hair that most women would die for, but I still would have preferred it short.  I'm not sure why this is my preference, but it is.  It doesn't mean I want every male to have a crew cut.  I also don't like shaved heads.  I just prefer men keep the hair on their head off their necks and shoulders and backs.  I also don't care much for facial hair, though some sideburns are acceptable.  Does this mean I won't have relationships with men who don't fit this description?  No.  These are just my personal preferences.  In most cases, I wouldn't dream of trying to impose my choices on anyone else.

I met Bud in December of 1976, a few weeks before he turned 20 years old (and yes, that makes me a cradle robber, Mrs. Robinson or a cougar, depending upon the era in which you grew up).  As was the unfortunate custom for young men at the time, he had long hair that reached just below his shoulders (thank you John, Paul, George and Ringo).  He had a FULL head of long, dark hair, but he was clean shaven.  He also had the clearest, most brilliant blue eyes I have ever seen.  Dark hair and blue eyes have always been my favorite, so you would think Bud and I would have gotten off to a good start, in spite of the length of his hair.  Au contraire, we took an immediate and intense dislike toward each other that lasted the better part of a year.

I don't remember how long or short my hair was at the time.  I believe it was probably significantly shorter than his though.  Throughout my lifetime, my hair has been every length from each strand being only 2" long to all of it being long enough to sit on.  It has also been every color (except black) from platinum blonde to chocolate brown, including green (twice), maroon and orange, though those were by accident.  It's a woman's prerogative to mess with her hair, and it's a wonder I still have hair considering how much messing with it I did over the years.  However, I have been blessed with a lot of hair -- thick strands and more per square inch than average.  My hair is healthy and one of the few things I actually make any effort to care for.  It also seems to grow fast, so if I really mess up it won't be long before it grows out.

By the time Bud and I managed to get past our animosities and started to develop a relationship, he had grown a mustache.  That didn't do much to make me think better of him.  He still has the mustache, so I guess it wasn't too great of an impediment after all.  He also still had the long hair.  A few months into our deepening relationship we had a discussion about hair, during which I expressed my dislike for long hair and facial hair.  As we all know, I am more than a little bit outspoken and almost always say exactly what's on my mind.  It's really a wonder I waited a few months to bring it up.  However, Bud is equally outspoken and fearlessly speaks his mind as well.  He told me he was keeping the mustache, but he would be willing to cut his hair and keep it short under the condition that I let mine grow and keep it long.  And so, though I would never allow someone to tell me what to do with my hair, I was willing to make this agreement since it didn't seem to me I had anything to lose.

Over the years, we've both been pretty good about keeping our bargain.  The length of my hair has varied, but in the overall scheme of things with only a few exceptions, you could say I've always had longish hair.  Bud's hair has been shortish, though he tends to let it get a bit shaggy before he heads for the barbershop.  He has lost a lot of his hair (to his eternal dismay) so he really only has fringe hair now.  When he lets it get rugged, he looks a lot like a demented scientist and I tell him so.  He eventually gets it cut and looks wonderful again for a few weeks.  His hair is still dark brown (what there is left of it) and his eyes are still clear crystal blue.  His mustache is totally gray.  I still don't like it, but after 30+ years, I rarely notice it.

My hair is currently very long.  It goes down to where my waist would be if I still had a waistline.  I usually tie it back or put it in a ponytail.  I have to tie it back to sleep, otherwise it tends to wrap around my neck and strangle me.  I wonder if that's what Bud had in mind when he originally insisted I let my hair grow?  Just kidding.  Since I can't drive any longer I can't make regular appointments for trimmings and such, so it will just keep on growing until I can't stand it one minute more.  Then I'll call a hair salon associated with Locks of Love, arrange someone to drive me, and donate most of this mane to someone who needs it a whole lot more than I do.  After all, it's hair -- it'll grow back for me.